Surgery Update

Ok, I have not gotten the surgery yet. I am still waiting on approval from Medicaid & the surgeons. I don’t see any issue with it being approved though. I have the agreements of my primary care & shrink for the surgery. I am hoping for surgery the first part of May.

B & D are taking off for Vegas (without me) in April. Even leaving me alone for my birthday (first time I have ever been alone on my birthday). Not entirely happy about it, but what can I do about it? Just hopefully, I will be able to celebrate it in style (sushi & martinis) the weekend before!

The next fun thing is that I am on a 1500 calorie diet (before was 2000). Wanna guess how much weight I have lost???????? NONE! I have actually gained 3 lbs. Aaargh!!!! *pull my hair out* Brenda says not to worry about it, but I do. I worry about everything. *hence my anxiety issues* I look like I am losing weight, my clothes tell me I am losing weight, but the scale says differently. Oh well, at least I know that I can do this diet. I have already found my protein shakes & bars that I want to eat. *tastes just like a candy bar* We have the pudding ready & B says she will make me soup & help me with the other things I need.

I don’t know what I would do without the support from everyone. It means the world to me. Both my online friends & offline friends & family are just the best.

That is where everything stands.

Weight Loss – Moving Forward

So I had my consult with the Weight Loss Surgical Center yesterday. They agreed that since I have tried just about everything the last thing for me to do is bariatric surgery. This is not a step I consider light or easy. I am currently scared to death & on the verge of saying fuck it & just letting myself go. Yes, I know that is not an option, so I guess I am stuck with surgery.

So I am going to get the gastric sleeve. I feel it will be the best option for me. I am not a compulsive eater, nor do I overeat a lot. I just don’t eat the “right” things. Basically, the surgeon is going to remove about 75% of my stomach & leave me with a banana shaped stomach. That is it. Since my main problem is that I am always hungry, I am thinking that this will help fix the issue.

Now come the part I am not horribly comfortable with. I am currently at 391 pounds. I don’t feel good, nor do I like how I look. Do not get the idea that I am not healthy though. Yes, I […] Continue Reading…

Celestarium WIP

So I was knitting on my Celestarium at the office the other day. A fellow part-time knitter came in & was looking at the picture & the chart & asked:

How do you manage to keep things in order & not lose your place? You put it down & pick it up all the time & I don’t see how you don’t lose your place.

I figured that if I got one question on how I do it, then there are probably others that want to know also. So I shall spill my techniques for keeping track of where I am & how I never (or rarely) lose my spot.

This is a picture of the chart for Celestarium. All credit for the design & such goes to Audry Nicklin. None of it is my doing. So you see all the circle & slashes? Yep, those are special stitches that have to be placed correctly. So how do I manage to handle putting the shawl down often? Simple. I’ll show you.

First, you find a suitable pattern holder. In this instance, Shiloh is being a sweetheart & holding the chart for me. Otherwise I use my magnetic chart holder (this one) or […] Continue Reading…

Big Changes

I had a shock last week. I went to my psychologist for my three-month check-in. (She wants to make sure I am not any crazier then I was before, lol) Part of the appointment is getting vitals. I hadn’t stepped on a scale for about two weeks, so I wasn’t horribly worried. I knew I was probably still in the 380 – 390 scale. Nope, I hit 401lbs! This was the last straw. I have been on weight watchers for over six months & I do exercise (probably not as much as I should, but I do). I don’t eat more than I should (honestly, I think I eat less than I should) & what I eat isn’t all that bad except for one day of the week when I have Chinese food.

So after a long & hard talk with the family, I have an appointment to talk to my primary care doctor & thankfully B is going to go with me. From there I am hoping to get a referral to a bariatric specialist. I want to make sure that there isn’t anything medically wrong with me. If there isn’t then I am going to […] Continue Reading…

Joke’s on me

I did a doozy last week. I broke my damn bed. How did I manage that one? Simple, I bent the damn frame until it separated at the joins. When you have myself (weighing in at a horrible 400lbs *more on that in a bit*), plus four dogs that weight, at least, 100lbs total, it causes for a very heavy amount to put on a damn bed frame. Then to top it off when I have insomnia I tend to roll around quite a bit. So I got a lovely surprise one morning. The bottom support went out & I went sliding from the top of the bed directly into the foot board. Since I didn’t know what happened & D & B were still asleep, I pulled the mattress & box springs off the frame & found the broken support. Once D woke up I had him come down to help me remove the frame. I got lectured about how I am not supposed to be moving heavy things (my fibro acts up every time I do & was no different this time). I thought the support just broke, but he found that the join had split. […] Continue Reading…